Pointless Ponderings

[melcreada]

Have been running around and, in quiet moments, been very sad. All the news that is pouring out of New Orleans is terrible and tragic and it makes me angry. I feel as if I have no right to be so comfortable in my home, angsting over how gas prices will affect my budget this weekend.



Am I horrified over the reports of looting/raping/shooting and people without basic means of survival? Yes. Am I suprised? No. Take away the thin confines of societal laws and people will behave as if civilization never even existed. My heart goes out to those who were trapped and unable to flee. Having lived in a typhoon-prone area, I know how scary they can be. But I also know that sometimes evacuation orders are premature/unnecessary.

I honestly don't know what I would do if I had been caught in that city or stuck in a huge auditorium with no a/c, backed-up toilets, and dead bodies rotting just outside. Maybe I would have grabbed a gun to protect myself. Maybe I would have pushed my way into Walmart to grab food and water and toilet paper. I hope to God I never find out exactly how far I would go to survive. All I do know is that the scene that is unfolding in New Orleans looks like half the nightmares I used to have as a child. And it is freaking me the fuck out.

But perhaps the worst part of this whole ordeal is that I am thinking about how this disaster will affect the company I work for (insurance...yikes). How it will affect the economy. And how it will affect me. It makes me feel like a tool for being selfish and shallow, especially because I want to be all happy and excited about the con.

So, I hemmed and hawed for most of today and decided that I would go ahead and drive to AnimeFEST. I looked into alternate transportation and I just don't have the time it would take to ride up in a train or bus. And an airline ticket is completely out of the question. My little Jeep doesn't have awesome mileage, but it's not too bad.

Once I get back, I am going to seriously look at alternate transportation for work. I live less than 3 miles from the office, for goodness sakes! The only problem is that the roads are HEAVILY trafficked in this short distance. I can guarantee that if I go on foot/bike, I will arrive to work on the hood of someone's car and no, I'm not joking. People are maniacs here and Melissa + bike is a comedy of pain and disaster waiting to happen.

So, yay for still going to the con! I leave early in the tomorrow, so I will be incommunicado until Monday night. Love to you all. Off to donate a little fundage to the Red Cross and then to bed.

Sweet repose be with in thine breast...

Comments

My thoughts have been along similar lines.

[white-death.livejournal.com]

Honestly, this is what I expected to happen in NYC 9/11. It shocked me that it didn't. I used to live in that city, and it is an ugly, ugly place.
I guess the difference is attacks from "the other" versus having your basic survival needs wiped out by "Nature." It almost begs you to become a caveman again.

Me, I don't worry about what I'd do in a situation like that. Frankly, it would be horrible, but I know I would survive. I'm always the one who's threatening to hike out into the wilderness and be done with the rest of the human race once and for all, anyway. Living in New York, I think I came close enough to that line between "man" and "animal" enough times that I know pretty much exactly what I'd do.

I don't tend to nightmare about stuff like that. ^^

In a cruel way, I'm kind of enjoying the basic destruction down there. I just wish the human race would learn that you can't flip this planet the bird all the time and never pay for it. But of course they'll rebuild. We always fucking do.

I do wish, however, that it wasn't just the poor "minorities" taking all the damage down there. As I told a friend, Bush would care a lot more if there were rich white folk trapped down there.

And I do wonder when someone's going to point out that the national guard forces which SHOULD be helping out down there right now? Were sent to Iraq to kill women and children - a much more important job.

*shakes head*
They can't get help in there DAYS later, but they sure enough jacked gas prices up right away, didn't they? We know where our administration's priorities lie.

/bitter ranting

*hugs* I hope you have a great time at the con. ^^ May you see many Howls!

Re: My thoughts have been along similar lines.

[joseishijin.livejournal.com]

Word to everything you said. Watching the horror unfold on TV juxtaposed with actually meeting some of the police/firefighters who drove out from California and Nevada to help was just mind boggling.

I like to think I am a survivor. But I have never been truly hungry. I have never endured true hardship. And although I have dealt without plumbing and electricity, I've never been without food or water for an extended period of time. It's scary to think about.

*hugs you for worrying about me, though*

I actually did not see any Howls, but I did see a Sophie. At least, I think that's who she was.

[white-death.livejournal.com]

Watching the horror unfold on TV juxtaposed with actually meeting some of the police/firefighters who drove out from California and Nevada to help was just mind boggling.

Dude, I bet.

I like to think I am a survivor. But I have never been truly hungry. I have never endured true hardship. And although I have dealt without plumbing and electricity, I've never been without food or water for an extended period of time. It's scary to think about.

You never really know until it happens.
I just keep thinking that a crowd of people must have been standing there doing nothing while those women and children were gang-raped and murdered in the Superdome. That's not something I could have done.

*hugs you for worrying about me, though*

*squish* ^^

I actually did not see any Howls

Awwwwww.

but I did see a Sophie. At least, I think that's who she was.

XD That's not good cosplay, if you weren't sure. *snickers*

[sardonicynic]

Sweetie, as selfish and awful as this may sound, you have every right to be safe and comfortable in your own home, freaking out about gas prices with the rest of us. It's your version of reality, and no one should make you feel guilty about it; that's such a dangerous road to go down, and once you start, there's not many places to turn back, as abject depression feeds more abject depression.

I have to pull myself out of that cesspool of hopelessness every time I hand money over at the supermarket or Target or whatever, thinking about the amount's South African rand equivalent, and what that could buy for a child. It's such a vicious cycle.

So while awareness is never a bad thing, paralyzing horror is most definitely not. And the media is feeding us horrific imagery nonstop, which, while good for the Red Cross and other relief organizations, is not so good for our psyches.

Also: You've most definitely helped by donating to the Red Cross, no matter how inconsequential it may actually feel to you. Seriously, that's way more than a lot of people are doing. Most are drowning in apathy or rendered dumb by the feeling of, "That's terrible. Too bad there's nothing I can do," and then put down the paper, turn away from the TV, go back to their Cheerios and drop the kids off at soccer practice later.

But I know it's frustrating and guilt-inducing to watch destruction on such a massive scale. We're all feeling powerless and angry at the Bush administration for their response to this -- or lack thereof. But that's a tangent for another day.

I'm sorry I've kind of just started randomly ranting -- I hope hope hope this helps somehow. *huggles* And I hope AnimeFEST was absolutely amazing!

[joseishijin.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I think I needed to hear that. It's so. I mean, there are no words I can produce that would adequately express my feelings about all this. It's on the backburner of my mind while I focus on my own life to keep from going start-raving mad.

*huggles*