Hrm...

[melcreada]

Busy, busy day. JP hit the road and I sit here, trying not to worry. It's just my nature. There is something in all of us, I think, that secretly fears happiness. It's like we're afraid the joy is nothing but an illusion that will be yanked from us the first chance we relax our guard. If I am not always pushing and testing that happiness, it might vanish and whoosh! All the air has been sucked from my lungs and I get permanent heartburn, another scar is etched and another ride on the rollercoaster is over.

*babble, babble*

I went to have lunch with Nay-nay. It was the most beautiful day for driving and as I passed green farmland and marvelled at the clearest sky I've seen in weeks, I thought how much I would love to spend the whole day outside. But then the sun rose a little higher, the breeze burned away, and humidity claimed all signs of life. Still, lunch was much fun and Nay-nay is always so wonderful to see. We may not speak for months and months and then pick up right where we left off. We've been this way since we were 15. I am very lucky, indeed.

We celebrated Father's Day tonight since I will be at work tomorrow. Dinner and some quality family time. It's always good to giggle with/at the siblings and the 'rents.

I have come to accept the fact that my order from Pocket may not make it here in good condition or even at all. That damn "fear of happiness" again. It was an expensive purchase and I sold lots of nice stuff to get it, but I am resigned to whatever the Great Postmaster in the Sky (and the U.S.) has in store for my little cel. *enhancing my calm here...give me a minute*

However, tonight there is a full moon, bright white and hazy with filmy cloud coverage. So beautiful it hurts. Very soothing. So all is well in my world.

Except for all this gaht-damn THINKING.

Work tomorrow. Yuck.

Still a grammar elitist whore. I was just checking my work email, mentally correcting the messages one of the Day Team Beotches sent out. Oy! It's called Spell Check. Give it a try! Only one tense, please and no run on sentences! Fragment! Fragment! Hee...I'm so mean.

Comments

[ixiepixie.livejournal.com]

I hear ya, sometimes I get that way too, if I'm too happy something bad might happen to take it all away. ^^;;; Times like this wish I could just say, "Don't worry about it!" but if it was me, I would be worrying too. So, best thing to do is to go out! Keep your mind off it, JP'll show up for you to help him unpack all his toys he's been collecting since he's 10 soon enough. ^_~ *hugs*

Try this...^^

*^_^*

[joseishijin.livejournal.com]

Thanks...I am trying to keep busy, but apparently work, the crazy family, my obsession with finding new LotR sites, and anxiously perusing the cels.org still leaves me with 2 or 3 hours of free time. Heh. I'm being very good. I've only bitten two nails off today. *grin*